Sexual Safety Series- Entry#1

The Benefits of Sexual Harm Reduction

There has been much focus in the current Bush administration on pushing abstinence as the "golden standard" to follow and the promotion of no sex until marriage. What world is the Bush Administration living in? Since gay men and lesbians can't get legally married in this Country, do they think we should never have sex? A crazy thought, but one I'm sure conservatives believe should be the case. I was a late bloomer not having sex for the first time until I was 18 years old, but thank goodness I had a good head on my shoulders and learned about HIV early in my sexual experience. Since most of us don't see abstinence as an option and others of us aren't in committed, sexually monogamous relationships, we have to navigate sex with the ever present thought of HIV in the back of our minds. But there are ways we can help protect ourselves against HIV and still have a healthy sex life.

Have you ever tried to change a behavior that you knew put you at risk for adverse consequences, but you still did it anyway? Maybe you tried to do that behavior a little less, so you didn't feel so bad about doing it. I know I have and I'm sure that everyone else has at some point in their lives as well. This exhibits the concept of harm reduction, which is continuing to do a behavior that may be detrimental to your health, but moderating it so that the negative effects won't be so bad. Apply this concept to sexual behavior and you have sexual harm reduction practices.

Here are a few examples of Sexual Harm Reduction that people can put into practice if your not doing so already:

1. Get tested for HIV AND STD's every 3 to 6 months. If you are sexually active with more than 2-3 partners a month on average, then you should get tested for HIV AND STD's every 3 or 4 months.
2. Before having sex with a casual sex partner look for any sores or bumps in the genital area. Even if it's a quickie in the park or a back room, simply use the light from your cell phone or a small keychain flashlight to check things out before you go to town. Sometimes there's a reason why he wants to have sex in the dark!
3. When giving head, try not to let him ejaculate in your mouth as ejaculation increases your risk of HIV transmission. If he does cum in your mouth, spit it out ASAP and rinse your mouth out with water or a mild mouth wash to flush the mouth out.
4. If you give head to casual sex partners regularly try to be aware of any abrasions or inflammation of your tongue or gums. If there's any bleeding definitely reconsider giving head. It's not advisable to brush your teeth prior to giving head, as brushing teeth usually causes at least some minor irritation to the gums.
5. If your planning on bottoming, whether you plan on it being with a condom or not, don't douche before hand. I know people don't want to "paint" or whatever terminology you use, but douching can damage the lining of the anus and make an entry point for HIV if you come into contact with it. If you really feel the need to clean the anus out before anal sex, then try to do so several hours before the encounter and/or use a mild cleaner such as water or a glycerin suppository . Don't use anything acidic such as a vinegar based product.
6. If you bottom, and the top ejaculates inside of you, try to eliminate as soon as possible to flush any germ out. Don't douche after sex as there is likely some tearing or inflammation of the anal lining, which could become worse by douching. Simply try to eliminate after the encounter.
7. If you engage in sex while under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol, try to cut back. For example if you have sex an average of 6 times a week and 5 of those times you're under the influence, then try to work towards being under the influence 4 out of 6 times and then 3 times etc. If you can't cut back all at once, try to do so in increments, this is what harm reduction is about.
8. If you're uncut, make sure that you keep the foreskin clean and dry. To keep it dry it's recommended that you use corn starch. If you don't keep the foreskin clean and dry, bacteria will build up and could get trapped in the foreskin. If some of the bacteria in there are HIV/STD germs, you could be trapping them in there and providing an opportunity for the germ to enter your urethra (your pee hole) and infect you, not to mention it will smell and who wants that!?
9. Get screened for Hepatitis A & B because they are prevalent in some cities among Men who have Sex with Men (MSM). If you are negative for one or both of these diseases, then get vaccinated for them. Vaccination will protect you from contracting them if you come into contact with them. Vaccinations for Hepatitis A & B can often be obtained free of charge at public health clinics. If you have insurance, your carrier should cover the cost.
10. If you're dating someone and considering having unprotected anal sex and the two of you are sexually monogamous, try to wait at least three months to avoid the primary stages of HIV infection. An HIV antibody test can detect HIV within a three month period after infection. After the three month period of sexual monogamy, go together to get tested for HIV AND STD's. If your not sure your partner has been sexually monogamous, then reconsider having unprotected anal sex. The alternative is to have protected anal sex.

These are 10 tips to help reduce your risk of HIV infection. Are there others people practice that you want to share? This is by no means a complete list.

If there's a main point I want to leave you with, it's that harm reduction is a means to an end, meaning that the ultimate goal is to eliminate as much risk for HIV and STD transmission as possible and still enjoy sex. Another point I want to make is that sometimes we need to expand our sexual toybox and not view sex as primarily anal penetration. There are lots of things other than anal penetration you can do and are less risky, but still enjoyable. Until the next post play safe and try something new and adventurous and safe!

I'm not suggesting in this post that if you do these behaviors you will be completely safe from HIV. These are merely things you can do to help decrease your risk. The only ways to truly prevent yourself from contracting HIV is to be sexually abstinant or to have a sexual partner where you are both sexually monogamous with each other and are both HIV-negative.